US and Israel Attack Iranian Oil — Still No Gas at Liepāja's Tosele Bus Stop

Last night, US and Israeli aircraft attacked Iranian oil facilities, which only caused loud laughter at the Tosele bus stop in Liepāja. Local bus driver Juris Kalniņš commented: 'They're blowing up oil warehouses over there, but we haven't had enough fuel here for years. Maybe those explosions will finally solve something?'

Iranian officials reported four casualties and toxic substances spreading in the air, but in Liepāja such reports only cause bewilderment. 'Acid rain? We get such acidity here every autumn that even Riga tourists flee back to the capital,' explains local meteorologist Līga Vējiņa. 'And about toxic substances in the air — haven't they been to Riga during rush hour traffic?'

Tehran's governor announced fuel supply interruptions, which only showed in Liepāja how far ahead of the world we are. 'They're only now learning what fuel shortage is,' laughs pensioner Kārlis, waiting at the Tosele stop. 'We've been practicing living without gasoline for years here — we walk or bike. Ecological and healthy.'

While Iranian residents are urged to stay home and avoid breathing problems, in Liepāja we've long been used to all kinds of air pollution. 'After surviving Riga's smog and even Jelgava's summer smells, Iranian toxic fumes seem like a spa treatment,' admits local resident Maija, waiting for the 5th bus.