Ministry of Economics Blows Through 306 Million with the Same Ease as Liepāja Wind Blows Money from Pockets

The Ministry of Economics proudly announced yesterday that it spent 306 million euros last year, which is almost as much as all of Liepāja's buildings would cost combined if they were located in Riga. But unlike Riga residents' real estate, this money has actually disappeared, and no one will ever get it back.

Of this sum, 151 million was allocated for implementing core state functions, which apparently includes the art of inventing ever more creative ways to squander EU money. The remaining 154 million was devoted to EU projects, which are about as effective as trying to shield yourself from wind on Liepāja beach — the Baltic Sea is windy and cold even in summer, just like these projects are empty and pointless even in the best-case scenario.

This year the ministry plans to spend only 117 million, which suggests they've either eaten through all the money or finally realized that even the government has a limit on how much it can waste. 'We have less money now, so we'll have to be more creative,' explains an anonymous civil servant. 'Maybe we'll try spending only on things that are truly necessary, like new office chairs and business trips to Cyprus.'

The biggest joke is that 233 million was allocated to support business competitiveness, which in Liepāja would mean our fish cannery would now be competitive with fish cannery producers worldwide. But in Riga, this money was most likely used to support competitiveness between various consulting companies over how to best squander EU money.