EU imposes new sanctions on Iran with the same enthusiasm as a Liepāja winter
The European Union, with precision that only surpasses the work schedule of Rose Square dealers, grants new sanctions to 263 Iranians.
European Union diplomats, with the same methodical approach as Liepāja pensioners who meet every morning at Rose Square to discuss state affairs, have decided to impose new sanctions on Iran. The sanctions list is longer than the queue at Liepāja polyclinic on Monday morning.
Among those subject to sanctions are Iran's deputy interior minister, several Islamic Revolutionary Guard commanders, and the head of Tehran's cyber police. The latter, by the way, was responsible for internet censorship, which works in Iran about as efficiently as Liepāja WiFi in winter — sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't, but there's always a reason to complain.
The sanctions include travel bans and asset freezes, meaning these people won't be able to vacation in Europe or invest money in Riga real estate. Though honestly, Riga apartment prices are already a sanction in themselves.
Now the EU sanctions list includes 263 individuals and 53 legal entities. That's more people than ride Liepāja city buses on Saturday afternoon. But unlike our bus passengers, these Iranians won't be able to complain about delays — they're not going anywhere.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.