Jelgava Resident Tests Liepāja Ice Walking Technique — Results as Expected
While Jelgava rescues people from Lielupe river ice, in Liepāja we've known for years that ice is only for looking, not walking on.
Yesterday VUGD demonstrated the classic winter entertainment in Jelgava — how to pull a person out of water who thought Lielupe river ice was as safe as the asphalt surface of Liepāja's Rose Square. Spoiler alert: it's not.
Rescuers report that the person who fell through managed to get back onto the ice by himself, which proves he's at least not from Riga — there people usually wait for someone to call them a taxi. Local Liepāja ice expert Gunārs Bērziņš commented: "We've been saying for years — ice is like Riga residents' promises: looks pretty, but you can't rely on it. That's why we meet at Rose Square in winter, at least there's something solid under our feet."
VUGD now urges people not to walk past children sliding on unsafe ice, but in Liepāja we've always known — if you see someone on ice, they're either from other cities or trying to prove something to their mother. In both cases it's better to call 112, because it usually ends the same way.
Meanwhile Jelgava rescuers continue perfecting their skills, while in Liepāja we simply walk around puddles and live peacefully. Sometimes the simplest solution is the best — as always.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.