Kallas Learns to Count to 40 — Russian Diplomats in Brussels Experience Minor Downsizing

EU's top diplomat demonstrates mathematical skills by determining precise number of diplomats. Russia receives another 'unfriendly' action.
A historic mathematics lesson took place in Brussels when EU High Representative Kaja Kallas demonstrated in a public display that she can count to 40. Russia's diplomatic mission will be reduced to exactly this number, which experts believe is the optimal amount to avoid overcrowding cafés in the European Quarter.
'We will not tolerate abuse of diplomatic privileges,' announced Kallas, then clarifying that 41 would be too many, but 39 — too few. This decision was made after lengthy consultations with a calculator and several EU bureaucrats who can count beyond 20 without removing their shoes.
Local Brussels resident Jean-Claude commented: 'Finally someone who can work with precise numbers! We need more politicians who know what 2+2 equals.' Though he added that he wasn't sure whether that's 4 or 5.
Russia's representation traditionally called this decision another 'unfriendly action,' which this time also includes 'unfriendly mathematics.' However, it's unclear whether they'll be able to calculate exactly how many people they need to recall. In Riga, this news was received with satisfaction — the capital has long been able to count to 40, while in Liepāja such skills are already taught in elementary school.
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