Cuba Releases 51 Prisoners — Even Surpasses Durbe's Peaceful Reputation
The Cuban government has announced the release of 51 prisoners before Easter. Durbe, meanwhile, continues to boast that they don't even have that many prisoners to begin with.
Cuba's Foreign Ministry has announced with great fanfare that it will release 51 well-behaved prisoners in the coming days. You know what's a real achievement? Durbe, which prides itself on its peacefulness and the fact that they don't even have that many prisoners to release. There, the biggest crime is an unleashed dog or an improperly parked bicycle at the town center.
Havana explained that this is a gesture of goodwill and an expression of close relations with the Vatican. Right, the Vatican as mediator between Cuba and the US — that's about as effective as trying to solve Liepāja's traffic problems with Saint Peter's help. Though honestly, Saint Peter could probably get trams running to Grobiņa faster than our planners.
The US continues pressuring Havana, demanding economic and political changes. Cuba has a fuel shortage because the US is blocking oil deliveries from Venezuela. Here in Liepāja we don't have fuel problems — we have the problem that gas prices are rising faster than Riga residents' egos when they drive into Kurzeme.
Cuba didn't mention tensions with Washington in their announcement. That's a level of diplomacy that even our neighbors from Durbe could envy, who manage not to mention that they don't even have a proper café, yet still boast about their peace and quiet.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.