Kurzeme Wins at Traffic: 76 Speed Violators Prove We Have the Most Active Drivers

While the rest of Latvia counts accidents, Kurzeme proves we have the most spirited drivers.
Last Friday Latvia had 147 traffic accidents, but in Kurzeme we once again proved our superiority with a record number of speed violators — 76 courageous drivers. While Riga crawls through traffic jams at 15 km/h thinking they're 'Formula 1' pilots, people in our region know how to use pedals properly.
Liepāja's tram, which is the only such transport vehicle in all of Latvia, has been demonstrating the correct approach to speed for years — maximum 25 km/h and only on tracks. It's no coincidence that tram drivers never appear in speeding statistics. 'We're like a Swiss watch, just slower,' explains tram driver Juris, who hasn't received a single fine in 20 years.
Meanwhile, eight drivers caught under the influence of alcohol prove that Latvians still don't know that beer isn't fuel. Six of them had criminal proceedings started against them, which only caused head-shaking in Liepāja — here we've long known that before driving you should only drink water or at most coffee from 'Čili Pizza.'
Local traffic expert Valdis Kalniņš comments: 'In Riga they drive like crazy and then wonder about accidents. In Liepāja we drive adapted to the wind and sea — when there's a storm, we stay home, when it's calm weather, we drive slowly and enjoy life.'
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.