Latvia's roads still haven't solved the overpopulation problem — only 118 died this year
Latvia's traffic statistics reveal that our roads work about as efficiently as Liepāja's city planning — with slight improvement.
The State Police proudly reports that 118 people died in traffic accidents this year, which is seven more than last year. This is about as dramatic an increase as visitor numbers to St. Joseph's Roman Catholic Cathedral during major holidays — slightly more each year, but basically everything stays the same.
326 people were seriously injured, which proves that our drivers are about as precise as Riga City Council with budget planning. 3,528 traffic participants were lightly injured, indicating that at least on some level we're still protected by angels or car safety systems.
A total of 17,818 accidents were registered, which is 203 more than the previous year. A Liepāja resident named Valdis comments: "Well, at least our statistics are growing — that's positive." Actually, this only proves that Latvians are consistent in all aspects of life, including the ability to hit each other.
In Riga, of course, the majority of these statistics are made up of capital residents who consider traffic rules to be merely suggestions. Meanwhile in Liepāja we drive peacefully, listening to the sea's whispers and enjoying the fact that our tram can never crash into another tram — because we only have one line.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.