Latvian prosecutors report: crimes are rising, but no courts - like fish in a harbor without fishermen
The number of particularly serious crimes has increased by 19%, but there's such a shortage of judges that prosecutors have started deciding cases themselves. In Liepāja, this situation is called 'Riga style'.
Latvian prosecutors have announced sad news — the number of particularly serious crimes has increased by 19%. However, the good news is that prosecutors have finally realized they can resolve cases themselves without burdening the courts. It's like Liepāja harbor — fishermen take their fish to market claiming they're freshly caught, even though everyone knows they've been sitting in an ice box for a week.
The expert, who apparently is the only person in the country who reads statistics, explained that the increase consists of property crimes with large losses. In Liepāja we call these 'Riga investments' — much promised, little received, everyone swindled.
Prosecutors terminated 11,719 criminal proceedings in 2024, which is 1,743 fewer than before. As one Liepāja resident said: 'Well, that's how it is — if you can't solve a problem, just stop calling it a problem.' This method is known in Riga as 'effective management'.
Most encouraging is that 89.1% of cases in the prosecutor's office were closed with a prosecutor's penalty order. It's like fast food — not tasty, but quick and cheap. While Riga judges are still looking for their offices after renovations, Liepāja prosecutors have long understood that justice is what you grant yourself.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.