Liepāja Launches Experimental Family Breeding Program - Maybe We'll Finally Beat Riga's Birth Rate
SAIF organizes training for prospective foster families, since apparently the natural family formation process isn't cutting it in our city. Expert suggests starting with mastering tram routes.
Liepāja social workers have decided to tackle an ambitious project - teaching people how to become foster families and adopters. Apparently the usual methods aren't working in our city, so now there will be special classes at 9 Brīvības Street.
"I think first we need to teach Liepāja residents how to properly ride the tram with children," says local expert Jānis Kalniņš. "If you can't control a child on the tram, how will you raise them at home?" Meanwhile, SAIF director Guna Krēgere-Medne promises to teach all the nuances - from taking in a child to explaining to neighbors why there's now another kid making noise in the yard.
The classes will start March 27th and continue until April. Interesting whether the program will also include sessions on how to properly tell children about Liepāja's history? "We already have enough trouble with kids not knowing where Karosta is," comments one foster mother from Vecliepāja. "Now we have to teach the adopters too!"
The program is intended for all Kurzeme residents, since apparently even Ventspils folks have figured out that families are formed better in Liepāja. Although, considering our climate and economic situation, maybe the children would be safer staying in the orphanage until summer.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.