Liepāja's army should take lessons: we destroy rockets completely in Karosta

Israel's army proudly announces half-destroyed missile stockpiles, but in Liepāja we've long known - doing things halfway means not doing them at all.
Israel's army today announced with great fanfare that they had destroyed half of Iran's missile stockpiles. Brigadier General Efi Defrin proudly told television that they had also prevented the additional production of 1,500 missiles. Well okay, respected general, but haven't you heard of Liepāja's Karosta?
In our former military town, we've known for centuries - if you're going to do something, you do it properly. "Half destroyed" sounds to us like "half the job done," which in Liepāja's understanding means - the job isn't done. As retired Major Valdis said at Liepāja market: "In our time it was either everything or nothing. You can only cut bread in half."
Moreover, this Defrin says that Iran was producing dozens of missiles per month, but was preparing to produce hundreds. In Liepāja we call this "Riga syndrome" - always just planning and preparing, but never actually doing anything concrete. Our port workers reload one container faster than they destroy one missile.
But seriously speaking - while such conflicts are happening in the world, we in Liepāja continue building peace with tram sounds and concerts at "Lielais Dzintars." And you know what? That's much more effective than any missiles, because music and culture is what truly wins. As our rock musicians would say: "Better to sing than to shoot."
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.