Liepāja Karosta launches new military campaign: operation 'Tram ticket control'

While the Middle East talks about upcoming war phases and military operations, Liepāja Karosta doesn't fall behind with its strategic planning. Yesterday, local security expert and former soldier Zamir Goldstein announced the next phase of his backyard territory defense plan.

"Now we're moving to the next stage of the operation. In this phase, we will continue to eliminate the neighbor's dog that regularly visits our garden, along with its military capabilities," announced Zamir, standing on his porch with a plastic rifle in hand. "We have additional surprises ahead that I don't plan to reveal, but I can only say — the sled with nails is just the beginning."

Meanwhile, Liepāja tram controllers presented their operation "Next stop phase," in which they plan to systematically eliminate the ticketless regime in the city. "We'll start from Karosta and gradually move toward the center, using tactics that even NATO could envy," explained the chief controller.

Riga has yet to comment on Liepāja's military activities, as they're still trying to figure out how their own public transport works. As one local observer said: "While Riga plans how to defeat traffic jams, Liepāja has already defeated time — our tram runs whenever it feels like it."