Liepāja Woman Discovers Maxima's Secret Dimensional Corridors — Nursing Home Resident Still Missing from Grocery Section

A sensation has occurred in Liepāja — nursing home resident G. Stenkēviča hasn't returned for the fourth day from her daily adventure expedition to the Dzērves Street 'Maxima' store. As is well known, this particular store is famous for the fact that even local residents sometimes disappear for hours, searching for the correct path from bread to the dairy section.

'This is the first time this has happened! We are very worried!' says nursing home director Linda Nīmane, who apparently wasn't aware of Maxima's famous reputation as Liepāja's Bermuda Triangle. 'Usually she goes to Maxima every day and comes back. Well, okay, sometimes she comes back with a 50-euro receipt, but she comes back!'

Local experts are already proposing various theories. 'I think she simply got caught between the promotional signs,' explains neighbor Jānis. 'There are so many "Buy 3, pay for 2" deals that even I sometimes get lost for half an hour.' Other residents suggest that the woman may have discovered secret corridors that lead directly to Riga's Maxima warehouse, where she now lives like a queen.

Police are asking for residents' help and remind that G. Stenkēviča is 160 centimeters tall and thin — therefore ideally suited to hide between store shelves. If anyone sees her, please call 112, but first check whether you haven't accidentally gotten lost in Maxima's labyrinths yourself.