Lille beats Liepāja in customs business competition we didn't even participate in
While nine cities fought for the EU customs agency, Liepāja peacefully counted its containers at the port.
The European Union has decided that the new customs agency will be located in Lille, France. Nine cities participated in the competition, but Liepāja, naturally, wasn't among them. Our city has long understood that it's better to be the one who controls goods rather than the one who controls them.
Lille's mayor Arno Delands enthusiastically announced that his city is located at the crossroads of Europe. Well, if he had seen our Karosta, he would understand what a truly strategic location is. While Riga is still thinking about where to put customs control, Liepāja has known for years — by the sea is best. Our beach and the Baltic Sea, windy and cold even in summer, is the best customs control point — no smuggler will want to stand long in this wind.
The new agency will mainly fight small orders from Chinese platforms. 12 million shipments per day! Local Karosta resident Valdis comments: "But where do all those phone cases go? I still haven't received a single one from AliExpress." Meanwhile, the EU plans to introduce a three-euro fee for each package. That's almost as much as coffee costs in Liepāja's center.
Actually, Liepāja doesn't need this agency at all. Our port already controls everything coming in and going out so well that even the seagulls are registered as customs officers. While Lille will be lost in its bureaucratic labyrinths, Liepāja will continue doing what it does best — being the main gateway between Europe and the Baltic Sea.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.