Parliament Decides on Teachers' Romantic Opportunities — Educators Protest at Rose Square

While Riga is still arguing about whether MPs are allowed to eat lunch in the Parliament cafeteria, the Progressives come forward with a revolutionary idea — to ban teachers, coaches and other adults in positions of power from forming romantic relationships with 16–18 year old youth. Yes, you read that correctly — now even the law will define what constitutes appropriate love.

The bill provides that violators can be dismissed from work without the right to appeal the decision. As our experienced physics teacher Inese from School No. 15 says: "Well okay, now I'll have to find a new hobby. Maybe I'll start collecting stamps or something like that." Anxiety is already beginning to form in our sports coaching circles — what kind of example will there be for the new generations if they can't demonstrate their "mentoring" skills?

In Liepāja, a spontaneous gathering of educators is planned for tonight at Rose Square to discuss this development. Local residents promise to bring warm drinks and moral support. As one of the organizers joked: "We are Liepāja after all — we're not afraid of sea storms or law changes. We just need to figure out where to look for true love now."

Meanwhile, the State Education Quality Service is preparing new instructions on how to distinguish professional interest from personal sympathy. Our sources indicate that a special app "TinderEdu" could soon appear, where teachers could search for compatible partners in their age group. As they say: if you can't with students, then with colleagues!