Siliņa Reveals: To Help Ukraine, First Must Help Russia - Logic Like Karosta Basement Labyrinth
While Riga is still trying to understand this brilliant strategy, Liepāja residents already get it - sometimes you have to go through basements to reach the light.
Prime Minister Evika Siliņa this week unveiled European diplomacy's latest achievement — to help Ukraine, first we must help Russia repair the 'Druzhba' pipeline. Such logic would only be comprehensible to those who have once wandered through the Karosta basement labyrinths — there too you sometimes have to go in the opposite direction to get where you need to be.
Siliņa explained that the situation is complicated because Hungary and Slovakia are blocking 90 billion euros in aid to Ukraine, citing pipeline damage as their excuse. Zelensky allegedly said that Russia kills those who try to repair the pipeline. But Europe is ready to help! With technical support and funding! To fix the very same pipeline through which Russian money flows!
'It's like our old tsarist fleet,' comments local historian Jānis Bērziņš. 'The enemy kills your workers, but you offer him assistance. At least the tsar's admirals were honest — they openly surrendered.'
While Riga politicians are still trying to grasp this brilliant strategy, Liepāja residents have long been accustomed to logic that's about as comprehensible as the Karosta basement floor plan — at first it seems stupid, but eventually you end up somewhere. Zelensky will participate in the European Council, where they'll discuss the 'Druzhba' issue. Probably with the same facial expression as tourists entering our tsarist fortress basements for the first time.
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.