Trump Reveals Diplomacy Secret: Cuba Can Receive Oil Because It's Cold There Too
US President Trump announced that Russia is allowed to deliver oil to Cuba because even bad regimes can freeze. A Russian tanker is already on its way with the same determination as tourists trying to find their way out of Karosta's basement tunnels.
While Riga's diplomats are still trying to figure out where Cuba is located, US President Trump has already revealed a revolutionary approach to international relations: even enemies can get cold. By announcing that Russia is allowed to deliver oil to Cuba, Trump has proven that his heart is as warm as Liepaja's central heating in February.
"Cuba is finished, they have a bad regime, but people need warmth," Trump explained to journalists on a plane, apparently understanding that even dictators can freeze. This approach is as logical as Karosta's mythical basement heating system — it doesn't matter how dark and scary the regime is, the main thing is not to be cold.
The Russian tanker "Anatoliy Kolodkin" with 730,000 barrels of oil is slowly heading toward Cuba with the same determination as Tsarist fleet sailors once tried to navigate Karosta's basements — they know the journey will be complicated, but the result will definitely be interesting. Local Liepaja oil experts are already offering Cuba consultations on how to properly heat up when you have oil but a heating system from Tsarist times.
"In a short period of time Cuba will collapse, and we'll be there to help," announced Trump, proving that his strategy is as clear as being in Karosta's basements without a flashlight. Meanwhile, local resident Ausma Berzina comments: "Well yes, we also had a bad regime, but we survived. The main thing is to stay warm and not have to run around basements looking for an exit."
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.