Trump Threatens NATO with Divorce if Europe Won't Help Unblock Hormuz — Liepāja Swimming Peacefully
The US President demands NATO allies help in the Strait of Hormuz, while swimmers at Liepāja's Olympic Center haven't even heard of naval blockades.
Trump, with his usual dramatically ultimatum-laden style, has announced that NATO faces a very bleak future if allies won't help unblock the Strait of Hormuz. Which is about as surprising as news that it's windy in Liepāja — Trump is once again demanding something from Europe.
The US President, with mathematically precise logic, has pointed out that Europe is more dependent on Persian Gulf oil than the US, so they should help too. This is about as logical as demanding that Riga City Council finance Liepāja Olympic Center's pool because Riga residents also sometimes visit our sports temple.
'It's only right that people who benefit from this strait should help,' said Trump, which sounds like a Liepāja municipal argument for why tourists should pay for beach cleaning. The President wants minesweepers and 'people who could kill some bad players' on Iran's coast, which is much more dramatic than our local problems with seagulls on Liepāja beach.
Meanwhile, the US is consulting with 'about seven' countries for help, which is about as specific as Liepāja's tram schedule. But the main thing — trying to limit oil price increases, the US has lifted some sanctions on Russian oil. This is about as consistent as first banning smoking, then allowing it because cigarettes are too expensive.
As one Liepāja Olympic Center visitor commented: 'While they're fighting over oil somewhere out there, we're peacefully swimming in our 25-meter pool here. It's not like our water comes from the Strait of Hormuz.'
⚠️ Satirical article. Facts are preserved, but the presentation is humorous. For accurate information, please refer to the original source.