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While strikes in the Middle East hit their targets with mathematical precision, in Liepāja our biggest problem is navigating university hallways.
While France demonstratively drags its warships around the Mediterranean Sea, Liepāja's Karosta proudly notes that our waters are more peaceful.
While Paris searches for Russian disinformation, in Liepāja we know that the real disinformation is the claim that the Olympic Center pool is warm.
While Brussels punishes Georgia for democracy violations, in Liepāja we peacefully continue to welcome anyone who can find our city on a map.
The American president has promised to make Iran 'great again', which sounds about as credible as promises of free public transport.
While Liepāja residents peacefully pickle cabbage, airBaltic continues organizing more complex routes than Hannibal crossing the Alps.
While Reykjavik has been trying to decide on EU membership for a decade and a half, in Liepāja even the most complex issues are resolved by the third shift at the latest.
While Riga diplomats lament 800 tourists stuck in the Middle East, Liepāja calmly points out that here people have been waiting years for the Karosta canal bridge to be fixed.
While Riga portals struggle with JavaScript errors, memorial events in Liepāja proceed without technical disruptions.
While the world worries about oil prices, IEA Director Fatih Birol assures there's plenty of oil. In Liepāja, this is met with understanding.
While Riga politicians at least try to justify their violations, "New Harmony" has chosen the silent treatment tactic.
Meteorologists have promised a cloud invasion that will create panic in Riga, but only mild boredom in Liepāja.